July 15, 2012

YOUR PLACE OR “MY PLACE?”

Maybe we should go to MY PLACE. (No, not my place, as in my home, but MY PLACE SPORTS BAR.)

Tuesday, July 17th, would be a wonderful day (make that, night) to meet.

Why you ask?

Because that night MY PLACE is hosting a nationally renowned event known as the “Deepstack Texas Hold ‘Em Tournament of Central Texas!” Yours truly has qualified for the tournament, which will be run by the lovely and talented woman we call “The Queen of Hearts,” ……. Ms. Gin Keller!

Now here’s the exciting part…. (at least to me!)….. In addition to some MAJOR cash prizes, the top three finishers will receive an autographed copy of the best-sellling mystery novel…. THE PRESLEY PLOT!

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!

Our hosts will be providing lots of table space for hundreds of copies of THE PRESLEY PLOT, and any player who buys a book will be given a chip bonus of…… $5,000!! (Or more.)

So what are you waiting for??? Come on down to MY PLACE on Tuesday, July 17th, and 6 p.m. and win a fortune plus meet a best-selling author! (Or me.) Seriously, I hope to see you there! Trust me, you will have the time of your life! (By the way, MY PLACE is at the Jester Exit off of 2222 in Austin!)

Hope to see you soon!

Doc Yanoff

July 13, 2012

THE “SEASONED” CITIZENS CENTER…..

Good day, ladies and gentlemen…..

As some of you know, I spent several years serving as a volunteer chaperon at the Austin Senior Citizen’s Center. (No, they weren’t being naughty! We were going on field trips around Central Texas.) I enjoyed every minute, and lately I have continued to speak at some of their meetings, as well as some of the large AARP groups that we have down in these parts. The turnout and reception are always good, and my most recent foray was no different.

After a brief discussion about THE PRESLEY PLOT (and high blood pressure!) I took some questions from the audience, and guess what??? There was a lovely woman in the group (somewhere between 90 and 95 years old) who actually met Elvis Presley during her youth! In fact, she met him in two countries at once! (Sort of.)

Apparently, The King performed on this very day at the “international” site known as….. NIAGARA FALLS! (On the U.S./Canadian border) The year was 1974 or 1975.

When she first mentioned Niagara, an older gentleman thought she said “Viagra” and he became quite interested in our conversation. He seemed rather disappointed when he learned that we were talking about the falls. Ah well, such is life.

The dear lady had a vivid memory of the Presley concert and even after all of these many years, she is still a huge fan. (She purchased two copies of THE PRESLEY PLOT, one for each of her grandchildren. Take that, Snoop Dog!)

Today is sunny and warm, so I must leave you now. (My “grand-dog” is staying with us this week, and he needs to go to the park.) Be well and be careful…..

Doc Yanoff

July 7, 2012

SOMETHING FISHY! PART 3!

All right, I promise… NO MORE MEZCAL DURING LUNCH!

I almost forgot to mention (and thank!) TheFriedbergFanClub (a vibrant and growing group of Elvis lovers) who generously offered to purchase 32 copies of THE PRESLEY PLOT for their next monthly meeting.

The lovely town of Friedberg (about 15 miles north of Frankfurt, Germany) just happens to be the place where a young Army private named ELVIS PRESLEY was stationed in 1958.

The King served with the 3rd Armored Division (for about 18 months) and rose to the rank of sergeant! (He served with distinction and was honorably discharged, which is a lot more than you can say for the present crowd of performers we have!) Although, to be fair, many country and rock ‘n’ roll singers do risk life and limb to entertain our troops… and they should be heartily cheered.)

Well, unless I’ve forgotten something (a 50-50 proposition!) I will be signing off for today. Enjoy your weekend….

Doc Yanoff

July 7, 2012

SOMETHING FISHY, PART 2!

I really need to hire a full-time proof-reader! The prominent businessman who kindly purchased 20 copies of THE PRESLEY PLOT was KEVIN EVANS! (Ken happens to be his dad, a fine gentleman in his own right, and like Kevin, a very good poker player.) Do NOT ask how many times Kevin and Ken have beaten me in a Texas Hold ‘Em tournament! I refuse to answer that question on grounds that will definitely incriminate me! (Yeah, they are that good!)

Anyways, me and the folks at Aberdeen Bay Press are grateful for Ken’s, I mean, Kevin’s support and friendship!

Seriously guys, thanks a lot!

Best to all,

Doc Yanoff

July 7, 2012

SOMETHING FISHY!

I’d like to wish everyone a happy (albeit belated) Fourth of July! Hopefully nobody had a “short fuse” and everyone had a “blast.” (I assume some of you got “lit,” but I won’t go there!)

My personal celebration included a wonderful guided fishing trip on Lake Buchanan in Central Texas. My compadres and I (Dr. Talbott and Professor Bomblatus) drove up to the charming hamlet of Tow, Texas, and “hooked up” (so to speak) with Ken Milam the legendary owner/operator of “STRIPER FEVER.”

Thanks to my well-honed skills as an outdoorsman (I brought the beer) we all had a great time and we each caught our full limit of fish. Ken was kind enough to filet the little rascals when we got back to shore, and we returned with plenty of delicious filets for that night’s dinner. (Trust me, you have not tasted fish until you’ve had fresh caught striper with Cajun seasoning, grilled over an open fire!)

Ken Milam is also the host of “The Great Outdoors,” a very popular radio program broadcast in the Texas Hill Country. Since I caught the biggest fish (all right, one of the biggest) he was kind enough to offer his help in arranging a book signing/speaking engagement at Callahan’s General Store, a landmark facility in Burnet, Texas. I am one busy buckeroo this summer, but if my schedule opens up, I intend to take him up on his offer.

Meanwhile….. THE PRESLEY PLOT continues to sell well and garner good reviews. Earlier this week, Ken Evans, a prominent Austin businessman (and one hell of a poker player!) purchased 20 books for family and friends. Thank you, Ken! A few more sales like that and I will be able to retire. (Again!)

I just received an interesting update on the Elvis Presley Steamboat Cruise leaving out of Memphis…. and I will post some tantalizing details in my next missive.

Until then, have fun and be safe…..

Doc Yanoff

June 29, 2012

PLAYING WITH A FULL DECK!

The author of THE PRESLEY PLOT (Stephen Yanoff) who happens to be a “REAL CARD,” is proud to announce that he has joined forces with Gin Keller, professional poker entertainment expert and marketing genius at the Deep Stack Poker Club in Austin, Texas.

Gin and her colleagues will now be advertising THE PRESLEY PLOT on their very popular web site….. and they will also be selling the book at their various poker tournaments throughout the southwest!

I am very pleased to be associated with this fine group (they do a ton of charity work in Central Texas) and I’m delighted that my new mystery novel (have I mentioned the name of the book?) will now be available to hundreds (perhaps thousands) of poker players in Texas.

As you might know, ELVIS enjoyed playing poker. No surprise. After all, he was THE KING OF HEARTS to millions of fans!

Incidentally, when I’m not traveling, scuba diving, or gardening….. I’m playing poker! (Texas Hold ‘Em, naturally.) I have won over 20 tournaments and I would probably win many more if I were allowed to cheat. (Definitely not a wise thing to do in the Lone Star State!)

Well, that’s about it for now. Remember, friends, never draw to an inside straight…. unless you already have a flush!

Vaya con Dios…..

Doc Yanoff

June 23, 2012

HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MARBLES?

I am very happy to report that Elvis (and his mother, Gladys) will NOT be losing their marble crypt after all.

The auction, which was scheduled for TODAY has been permanently cancelled due to a massive (and international) public outcry. As I previously

mentioned, Elvis and his mother were briefly interred in the crypt, which is located in Forest Hill Cemetery in Memphis. (Do NOT attempt to find

this crypt in Forest Hills, New York!) You could be seriously injured by a tennis player! Anyway, I’m glad they cancelled the auction and have

decided to maintain the burial site as a tribute to the King. They still need to erect that fence I spoke of. (Yeah, that’s right, people are “dying to

get in!”)

Some of you have asked about the section in THE PRESLEY PLOT that deals with crypts and mausoleums. You were curious about the difference

between the two. Basically, a crypt is underground. (Often under a church) A mausoleum is an above-ground structure. In case you’re interested,

the word “mausoleum” comes from the Tomb of Mausolus, and amazing structure built around 350 BC at Bodrum, Turkey. I have been to Bodrum

a number of times and have always been fascinated by this tomb. (It was built to contain the body of Mausolus, a major player in the Persian

Empire.) Believe it or not, it was so impressive for its day that it was considered to be one the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World!

(The Frozen Margarita finished number eight. What’s that about?)

Well, my friends, it is roughly 100 degrees down here in Austin, so I must bid you adieu and jump in the pool.

Take care, be happy, and I shall write again soon.

Doc Yanoff

June 19, 2012

WHAT THE HELL, A KISS-AND-TELL???

Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. One of the King’s gal-pals (Linda Thompson, a former Miss Tennessee!) has apparently published a book that claims that Elvis was a “womanizing, pill popping fiend who terrorized his loved ones with violence.” (If you ask me, I think the poor woman was a little confused. Maybe she was thinking of a certain ex-Senator and ex-Presidential Candidate from North Carolina?) Just saying.

Anyway, this type of stuff is to be expected, so if you like Elvis, don’t be dismayed. As we approach the 35th anniversary of his death other folks are bound to come out to cash in on his reputation in some sort of negative fashion. BUT NOT “THE PRESLEY PLOT!” For those of you who have not yet ordered a copy of the book from Amazon.com, I would remind you that it was not my intention to portray Elvis in a negative light. (Here’s some trivia that might explain my view: Did you know that the VERY FIRST record album I ever bought (with my babysitting money!) was a fantastic record called “Elvis Presley’s Golden Hits?” I played that record continuously, memorized every lyric, and actually wore out the grooves! I still have the album, but I don’t have an “old fashioned” record player anymore.

Incidentally, I’m not saying that the big guy was perfect (who is, besides me and you? And frankly, I have my doubts about you.) BUT….. just for the record….. I think my readers should know that Linda Thompson was once married to….. Kim Kardashian’s super-jock stepdad Bruce Jenner!

Your Honor, I rest my case.

So there you have it folks. The latest gossip. By the way, this story (about the forthcoming kiss-and-tell book) was first published in a highly questionable “rag” called The Globe. (A British tabloid who published the story with this headline: ELVIS’ LOVER TELLS ALL!)

Reminds me of something Mark Twain once said: “If you don’t read the newspaper, you will be uninformed. If you do read the newspaper, you will be misinformed!”

Amen, brothers and sisters.

Doc Yanoff

P.S. I hope one of my ex-girlfriends writes a book about me. I could use the publicity!

June 15, 2012

Go Take a Flyer

Well, when my publisher told me to go take a flyer, I never thought it would end up looking so good! Attached, for your visual pleasure, is a copy of the recent advertising flyer that was designed for THE PRESLEY PLOT. I hope you like it as much as I do. Next week it will be mailed out to over 500 Elvis Presley Fan Clubs throughout the United States and in various foreign countries. (Including Arkansas!)

June 14, 2012

DON’T STOP THE PRESSES!

Well, I scored some big points today…..

In fact, I scored four points. (As in THE FOUR POINTS NEWS!)

In case you’re wondering what I’m babbling about, I just had the privilege of being interviewed by THE FOUR POINTS NEWS, one of our

outstanding local newspapers. (They have a large and growing circulation that reaches almost 10,000 homeowners in West Austin!)

The reporter and I spent about an hour together discussing THE PRESLEY PLOT, and then she took some photographs of my rock garden.

(Rumored to be one of the largest privately owned rock gardens in our galaxy and most of the universe as presently understood by the scientific

community!)

I really enjoyed the interview and will post the full article as soon as it is published. Hopefully, this will be the first of many such interviews.

Meanwhile….. orders for THE PRESLEY PLOT continue to pour into Amazon.com, and much to my surprise, they are now on their third

or fourth printing. (God bless my mother!) I would like to thank everyone who has purchased a book (and especially those who have purchased

more than one) and I want you to know that I intend to take each and every one of you to the Academy Awards. (What a bus trip that will be!)

Starting planning your vacation days and looking for baby-sitters!

(Brad and Angelina will be supplying the hot dogs and beer.)

Love to all….. Doc Yanoff