If the King was alive today….. he would be very old!  (77 years old!)   Still, one must wonder which sporting event Elvis would have enjoyed the most.  (Please, no jokes about the “broad jump” or the “breaststroke!”)  As a former wrestling champion, I would like to think it would be wrestling, but your guess is as good as mine.  As some of you know, I actually petitioned the Olympic Committee, seeking the addition of the one athletic event in which I still excel (I’m afraid my wrestling days are over) but they declined to include the Potato Sack Race!  Yeah, I know what you’re thinking….  what’s up with that?!  In my view, they are clearly anti-spud, and if you think I’m just bitter….. when was the last time the Olympics were held in Idaho????

I rest my case.  By the way, I actually won a blue ribbon in the potato sack race back in elementary school.  (The crowning achievement of my time at Wheeler Avenue School in Valley Stream, New York!)  I still have the blue ribbon I won, and to be perfectly honest, I have been known to wear it on my lapel from time to time.  Not to brag, but it was a very tough race.  Very tough.  The judges forgot to tell me that I was supposed to put my legs in the sack!  Have you ever tried running a race with a sack over your head?  Thank God I had a good sense of direction during my misspent youth!

By now you are probably wondering why I am discussing the Olympics, eh?  Well, there is method in my madness…..  I am on my way to London!  That’s right, old chap, the missus and I are flying across the pond at the end of the week, anxious to spend one glorious week in jolly old London!  Hide the gin!  Hide the Indian food!  Hyde the park!

We will be staying at the lovely Egerton House Hotel in fashionable Knightsbridge!  (I hope they have indoor plumbing.)  The hotel looks wonderful on the internet and from my travel sources, I understand that it is quite posh.  You know the drill, silk sheets, full gourmet breakfast, afternoon tea, and lots and lots of tarts.  (No jokes about my wife!)  They have a bartender named Antonio who has been working there for over 40 years…… and makes the best martini in the world!  I cannot wait to make his acquaintance!  I am sure we will become fast friends.

After some days in London, we are off to Paris, France, which I hear awaits my arrival with baited breath!  (I will be signing copies of THE PRESLEY PLOT both in London and Paris, and engaging in several speaking forums……  which should prove quite interesting…… since I do not speak a word of French!)   Nevertheless I am looking forward to the trip and also to speaking to our European cousins.  I love Europe, even though the place is filled with foreigners!

When we have “done” Paris, we travel south to Lyon, and then board a luxury barge for a week-long trip down the Rhone!  The ship sails (glides) down the river very slowly and travels through the heart of Provence!  I am really looking forward to this part of the trip, as I have often dreamt about such a voyage.  The food is supposed to be five-star, and the excursions are simply marvelous!  (wine tasting, foi gras tasting, souffle tasting, etc.)  Do you think I’m dwelling on the food too much?  Yeah, me too!  Well, man does not live by bread alone…… I promise to drink my share of burgundy!

I will fill you in later about the rest of the trip……  my sweet grand-dog (Baker) is growling at me because he needs to go for a walk!  Duty calls!  I am going to the dogs!  Make that, going with the dog…..

Have a great day!

Doc Yanoff