WELL, THIS IS A HEADLINE WE WILL NEVER SEE, BUT….. YOU HAVE TO ADMIT IT GOT YOUR ATTENTION!

Look, my life is an open book.  I can’t help it if nobody wants to read the darn thing.  Speaking of books…  (wasn’t that a clever segue?)  I regret to announce that my upcoming book signing in Syria has been cancelled by the State (of confusion) Department.  Just as well.  My last engagement in Syria was a bomb.  (Oops, poor choice of words.)  Our tour bus broke down in Jerusalem and we had to walk all the way to the Syrian capital.  The road to Damascus was the turning point of my life, and me and a guy named Paul (our bus driver) found the experience rather heavenly.

But I undress, I mean, digress…..  Where was I?   First, I would like to thank Dr. Gary Rubenstein for the healing shoulder patches he provided to lessen the discomfort of my recent rotator cuff injury.  They worked wonders, and I am now back on the parallel bars, training for the Tokyo Olympics.  (Talk about “stretching” the truth!)

Second, I am proud to announce that DEVIL’S COVE  (Book three in the Adam Gold Mystery Series) was recently chosen as the “Outstanding New Mystery of the Year” by the Baytown Book Club of Harris County.  (Near Houston.)  Thank you, folks.  I greatly appreciate the award!   Incidentally, THE PRESLEY PLOT is in the final stage of revision, and if all goes well, it should be re-released at a gala book party sometime in October.  (Hopefully at Graceland in Memphis or at the Elvis Presley Center in Tupelo!)

My (semi) professional poker career took a direct hit last Thursday evening.  Just as the Mighty Cobra (me) was closing in on the final table and the championship, I ran into “The Black Widow.”   (The new poker name of the beautiful and talented Sharon Francia.)  I had 3 eights, and was reaching for a mountain of chips, when Sharon announced that the third “8” gave her a straight!  (Thereby sending me “straight home.”)  I’m telling you, life just ain’t fair!

But, please, do not feel sorry for me…..  Last night we attended a delightful pool party, given by the Prince and Princess of Portugal, Lee and Helena Bomblatus.   The food, conversation, and weather were perfect!  We dined on gourmet cheese, prosciutto and melon, insalata caprese, corn pudding, and marvelous grilled salmon.  (Washed down with some darn good wine!)  It was a memorable meal, and a lovely way to slide into September.  Our host and hostess are on their way to Portugal for an extended vacation, and we wish them well!  (Bring back some olives for me!)

Tonight is another party, but this one is downtown….. at a terrific new brewery in Austin.  (Pale Dog IPA)  I know what you’re thinking….  when does this man have time to write?  To be honest, I write between naps.  Not an easy task, but somebody has to do it.  (Now that Vince Flynn and Elmore Leonard are gone.)  Granted, there is a great deal of pressure on me, but I can handle the stress.  I’m tough as nails.  (fingernails!)

Well, my dear friends, I must leave you now…..  I am on my way to Castle Hill Fitness Center, where, upon my arrival, I shall receive a wonderful deep tissue massage.  I’m sure this will be a “touching” experience.  Please keep those cards and letters coming, have a safe week, and enjoy life!

Love to all……

Doc Yanoff

P.S.   I’d like to wish all of my Jewish acquaintances a Happy and Healthy New Year!