If you celebrate Christmas, joy to the world!  If you celebrate Hanukkah, oy to the world!  Either way, I hope you and yours have a wonderful holiday season, filled with laughter and love!  I love the holidays because of all the gifts I receive.  (Actually, I have enough lumps of coal to open my own mine!)  It’s good to have an open mine, yes?  Still, I’m hoping that Santa will bring me something different this year.  Here’s a hint:  Coal and diamonds are primarily made of carbon.  If you squeeze that black lump, and add some heat, you’ll get a sparking jewel.  (I once saw Superman do it.)  Just saying.

Speaking of gifts, here are this week’s trivia questions:  What gifts did the Three Wise Men bring?  If you said gold, frankincense, and myrrh, you’re right!  (If you said “Adam Gold,” The Bride of Frankenstein, and Myrrh Griffin, we need to talk.)  Second question:  What is the meaning of Hanukkah?  If you said it was an 8-day Jewish holiday commemorating the rededication of the Holy Temple, you’re right!  (If you said Jews are supposed to sing “You Light Up My Life,” and burn the candle at both ends, we need to talk.)

So what’s new in the secular world?  Well, this week President Obama reached out to a wacky government of commie radicals living on a small island close to the U.S. mainland.  He even spoke to their left-leaning leader on the telephone!  (I have no idea what Obama and DeBlasio talked about.)

Hey, I joined a new club for writers this week.  It’s called the Thesaurus Club.  The only rule of the club is you don’t talk about, mention, speak of, discuss, or chat about meetings.

Did you hear about the man who walked into a bookstore and said, “I hope you don’t have a book on reverse psychology.”

Last Thursday I had the pleasure of attending the 2nd annual “Talbott Tuneful Tie Festival,” down at the Austin Club.  The food and wine were outstanding.  (I was out standing in the lobby.)  I’d like to thank our hosts, who recently posted bail, Barbara and Max Talbott.  Another perfect evening!  (Well, almost perfect.  Whistle-blower #7 was a problem.)

For those of you that are searching for the perfect last-minute gift, please remember that all of my searing novels are still available on Amazon.com, Barnesandnobe.com, Kindle, and Nook.  (Oddly enough, my searing books are not sold at Sears.)  Go figure.

In closing, I would like to share an interesting thought with my loyal blog followers.  Do you realize what you would have if you combined a fictional detective (similar to Adam Gold) with Santa Claus?  Why, nothing less than….. Santa Clues!  Verily, I say unto thee, go forth and have a marvelous holiday!  And please, remember one thing, try not to catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have flown south!

Peace on earth, goodwill toward men… and women, too!

Love to all,

Doc Yanoff