THE RETURN OF CAPTAIN KIDDER!

I am happy to report that the infamous pirate/punster (Captain Kidder) and his female accomplice and first mate (Poker Patty) have returned to port…  (we found a bottle in our luggage!)  After we consume the port, our intention is to unpack, which might take some doing after logging 3,545 miles on our recent book tour/family visitation/Caribbean voyage.  Nonetheless, somebody has to do it, so it mighty as well be Patty.  (I only handle booty….  no jokes, please!)

All in all, it was a remarkable venture, which began in Austin and continued east, with stops in Delray Beach, Boca Raton, Fort Lauderdale, Eleuthera (Bahamas), Jamaica, Cayman Island, Cozumel (Mexico), and then up through the Florida Straights to Miami.  Whew, what a trip!  Too much food and drink, but just the right amount of Texas Hold ‘Em Poker.  (We won enough loot to fill a small treasure chest, or Dolly Parton’s bra.)  Incredibly, the seas were almost flat (no more bra jokes, please) and every day was sunny and warm.  Needless to say, we got very lucky.  (And missed Hurricane Arthur!)

While each day brought new adventures, some events were truly memorable…..  For instance, I learned that the good folks of Jamaica, in preparation for my arrival, named a culinary dish after me.  It’s called “Jerk Chicken,” and just like its namesake, it is hot and spicy, and easier to swallow with a hefty dose of rum.  When we reached the Cayman Islands, we saw the maritime version of that movie about Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons.  (JERSEY BUOYS)  After a glass or two of tequila, (in Cozumel) I actually tripped over the Captain’s Log!  (What was he doing on the bridge?)

The highlight of our trip was meeting new people and making friends with some wonderful folks from all over America…..  Kathy & Ernie from Naples, Beth and her hard-working hubby from Illinois, Susan and James from Florida, Jeanie & Carl from Michigan, and the list goes on and on……  (please forgive me if I left your name out!)  Like I said, the best parts of travel always include the amazing, unselfish, hard-working, honest, loyal, and intelligent citizens that you meet.  What a blessing to live in a country with so many wonderful human beings!

Which reminds me…..  Happy Birthday, America!  (You still look great for your age!)  We celebrated part of the Fourth by drinking some fine Caribbean rum in a famous water-side tavern…. a tavern that was once frequented by Captain Kidd.  (The tavern was mentioned in my second mystery, THE PIRATE PATH)  I was surprised to learn that some Caribbean bars actually charge you for resting your fists on the bar while you’re drinking!  Imagine my surprise when they handed me a…..   “Bar Knuckle Bill!”    (Hey, they don’t call me Captain Kidder for nothin’!)

Well, mates, I must leave thee now….. time to return to the mundane world of law and order… and a different set of bills.  (Electric, gas, water, etc.)  If you get a chance, check out the new reviews for THE SECOND MOURNING which have been posted on Amazon.com   Thanks for your continued support, and please continue to spread the word about the book… I may need bail money for my next voyage!  (Especially if I don’t get some new material!)

Have yourself a safe and wonderful week!  Love to all…..

Doc Yanoff

 

 

 

 

THE SNOOZE CRUISE!

WELL, HERE I AM ABOARD THE LOVELY CARIBBEAN PRINCESS!  (By the way, that’s the name of the ship, not a person.)  We are bound for Cozumel.  (Bound to get there in a day or two.)  I slept GREAT last night.  Wonderful mattress.  Ever hear of a “sea bed?”  One funny incident to report…  My wife asked someone where our “mustard station” was located.  (She meant muster station.)  I told her to go ahead, I would “ketchup” later!  I’m glad I packed some condiments, just in case I get lucky.

So what’s new in the wonderful world of literature?  Funny you should ask.  Are you sitting down?   The Dashiell Hammett Club of Los Angeles has chosen DEVIL’S COVE (my third mystery novel) as the “OUTSTANDING MYSTERY OF THE YEAR!”  WOW!  I am very honored and would like to thank you for the delightful surprise.  (Hammett was the author who created the hard-boiled character of Sam Spade.

I would also like to thank all of my Austin friends for buying so many copies of THE GRACELAND GANG and THE PIRATE PATH.  Both books have sold well and are now being featured on the BEST-SELLER table in the front of the store.  (BookPeople on N. Lamar Blvd.)  They just re-stocked the shelves, so if you need an autographed copy, come on down.  (I have attached a couple of photographs from a recent luncheon at the store.)

Tomorrow we reach Cozumel, and then (the day after) we go to Honduras, and then Belize.  The seas are calm, the sun is out, and it’s about 77 degrees outside.  Perfect tanning weather!  I got lazy this morning and slept in, missing my gym time.  That makes 3 years in a row.  I’m about to give up exercising!  My press my luck?

The Princess and I are registered to today’s poker tournament, which begins at 12 noon.  Hopefully, I will have some good news to share with you, but even if I don’t win the tournament, I will make up a good story!  (Any fool can convey the simple facts!)

I wish you all a safe and pleasant week, and if we don’t get captured by pirates, I will write again mid-week.  If we do get captured by pirates, send me a couple of roast beef sandwiches.  (Pirates love  “ARRRRR-by’s Roast Beef!)  Love to all…

Doc Yanoff