DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!!

WOW, did you folks catch a glimpse of that flaming asteroid that streaked by earth last weekend?  When it entered the earth’s atmosphere it broke into smaller pieces called hemorroids.  (I think that’s what they’re called.)  They are small, but dangerous and can be a real “pain in the butt.”  The smallest particles are very photogenic, and are known as polaroids.  I don’t know about you, but I love to gaze at heavenly bodies with my telescope.  (No, I don’t mean the neighbors.)  If you’e wondering how I know so much about astrology, it’s because I wanted to be an astronut when I was a young whipper-snapper.  In fact,  I went to college on a NASA scholarship.  Well, actually I was just taking up space, but you get the idea.

Hey, do you think an astronomer is the same thing as a night watchman?

Anyway, there are billions of asteroids in the solar system, so don’t worry if you missed the last dazzling show.  Did you know that the chance of asteroids colliding is roughly equivalent to winning the lottery every day for a week?  Strange, but true!  Of course, if an asteroid of any size does hit the earth, the results could prove fatal.  Just ask Fred Flintstone.  A big sucker hit our planet 65 million years ago, and contributed to the extinction of the dinosaurs!  (Although some think it was an STD.)

Since I live in Austin, I can tell you one thing…..  The stars at night are big and bright.  Deep in the heart of Texas.  The prairie sky…   Never mind, you get the picture.  Speaking of stars…..  my new book, THE SECOND MOURNING, recently received the equivalent of a 5-STAR review from Kirkus Book Reviews, the world’s largest book reviewer!  The critics were very kind, referring to my modest masterpiece as “An immensely readable narrative.”  They also said I was funny and handsome.  (All right, I made that last part up, but my mother thinks I’m nice.)

Sad about Joan Rivers.  Not a huge fan, but I did appreciate the fact that she spent her entire life making others laugh and smile.  I’ve been thinking about cremation this week, and although I am going to seek a traditional burial, I do have to admit that cremation would be my last chance to have a hot, smokin’ body!

“The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves.”  (Not exactly relevant, but I wanted to add some class to this blog post!)

Finally, some breaking news…..  I recently put the finishing touches on the fourth “Adam Gold Mystery,” which is titled, RANSOM ON THE RHONE.  I am happy to report that my publishers, Murder Ink Press/Penguin Books, loved the story and are hard at work designing an appropriate book cover!  Incidentally, the original cover concept was the work of my good friend, Vicki Kaufman, owner of Blue Heron Design Studio.  If you ever need any graphic designs, she’s the gal for you!  (She lives in Cedar Park, Texas.)

In closing, I would like to confirm the rumors that I will be at a book signing in Georgetown next week.  I’m not sure of the time and place, but I will post both as soon as I learn the details.  (Just keep the entire week open, OK?)  And remember, my dear friends, don’t take life so seriously.  It’s not like you’re going to get out alive!

Have a safe and joyous week!  Love to all,

Doc Yanoff

P.S.  We wish a safe and wonderful voyage to our loyal blog followers, The Princess of Portugal and Baron Lee!  Bring me back a croissant!

 

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