Let’s face it, laughter is also the only medicine that is still affordable!  I just had my annual “wellness exam,” and well, it made me sick!  (The cost was quite high, but my Uncle Sam paid most of it.)  Getting older has its benefits, even if your “benefits”only cover 80% of your bills!  I guess I shouldn’t complain.  Some parts of the exam were very reasonably priced.  My doctor, Shakey Shlomowitz, only charges $19.95 for a full colonoscopy.  (The procedure is done at our local Jiffy-Lube, but they have good donuts in the waiting room.)  Ever hear the term “cold hands warm heart?”  Never mind.  Let’s move on.

The good doctor told me that I have the body of a much younger man.  (Who was King Tutankhamun?)  I’m not sure, but I think he was the Egyptian fellow who invented the Pyramid Scheme.  (That joke “sphinx!”)  Where was I?  Oh yeah, my medical results…  Everything (except my I.Q.) was normal or getting there.  If I can avoid strenuous work (i.e., taking out the garbage) I can look forward to a long and fruitful life.  (Unless I slip on a banana peel.)

So what else is new?  Well, I had a most enjoyable trip to Port O’Connor last week, even though I did not go fishing.  (Although I did cast a wide net in the literary world.)  I first went to Port O (as we locals call it) back in the late 1970s, and I have always enjoyed my visits.  (Especially when I catch some redfish or speckled trout!)  My favorite restaurant, Josie’s Mexican Food, is still in business, and still serves the best greasy enchiladas on the coast.  If you’re not “into” fishing, you can rent a kayak from Dolphin Kayak and paddle along the coast for hours.  (Or in my case, for several minutes.)  If fried food entices you, try the shrimp at Cathy’s Restaurant, but don’t tell her that I sent you.  (Who knew you were supposed to leave a tip?)

By the way, I only brought one case of books to Port O, but we sold every one of them!  (and gave several books as gifts)  The attendees seemed to crave mystery novels, so I brought down autographed copies of DEVIL’S COVE and RANSOM ON THE RHONE.  If you find yourself on the Texas coast, make sure you leave time to visit the Matagorda Island National Wildlife Refuge.  The place is simply magnificent.

Speaking of magnificent, I had a marvelous time at the Steiner Ranch Annual Poker & Barbecue Invitational Poker Tournament.  (known in the poker world as the S.R.A.P.B.I.P.T.)  I would like to thank our hosts, Rich and Sharon Walker, and the (semi) Honorable Kevin Evans, and the lovely Miss Pat Little for providing food, drink, and lousy cards!  In all seriousness, it was a fun evening, and we are all grateful for the efforts of so many nice people.  (Now, if I could only do something about those dang cards….. )

Incidentally, several of my loyal blog followers have inquired about the status of my next “Adam Gold Mystery.”  Fret not, as guitar players like to say, everything is coming along nicely.  The book (“A RUN FOR THE MONEY”) is being re-edited, typed, and blocked as we speak.  The cover will be addressed next week, so if you have any suggestions, please send them along.  (With a cash payment of $25 to cover my recent medical bills.)

Finally, I would like to remind you that there are 19 days left until Christmas, so you still have plenty of time to get your favorite author a little gift.  (I will post all of my sizes, except my waist size, on a future blog.)  Also, tonight at sundown, is the first night of Hanukkah, so allow me to wish all of my Jewish buddies a healthy and joyous week.  I don’t know if I ever mentioned this, but one of my uncles actually thought that he was a matzo ball!  (Doc Shakey told him not to worry.  The feeling would “pass over!”)  Oy vey, what an ending!

Have a safe and prosperous week…..   Love to all,

Doc Yanoff