HOWDY PILGRIMS! (Do you think John Wayne said this to the 102 passengers who arrived on the Mayflower in 1620?) You never know. In any case, I hope you and yours had a delightful Thanksgiving. We had a large family get-together and a big turkey. (I’m not referring to myself here!) Our feast was wonderful and during dinner I entertained my fellow pilgrims with some edifying information about the holiday we were celebrating.

For instance… did you know that turkey was probably not on the menu at the first feast? (Too hard to catch or kill, and a pain in the butt to cook.) In all likelihood, the pilgrims and Indians ordered take-out. (whatever they could take out of the stream) Maybe they had Chinese. You never know. Nowadays, Americans eat about 46 million turkeys on Thanksgiving… and 50 million pumpkin pies! Gooble gooble!

Would you like to guess which US president made Thanksgiving a national holiday? (Here we have a number of turkeys to choose from!) If you said Abe Lincoln, you’re right! (Biden and Trump were the first to offer a pardon to every turkey in the country!) Do you think that was a “fowl” joke?

Lest I forget, I should say a word or two about last Friday’s football game between Texas A&M and the University of Texas. As some of you know, I hold 3 degrees from the A&M university system, but I’m not bitter about losing to the drug-enhanced, testosterone-filled thugs who play for the Longhorns. Not bitter in the least. Actually, I feel sorry for U.T. After the big game, some Aggie broke into the University of Texas library and stole the book! The police recovered the book, but all the pages had been colored in by the thief! But, hey, I’m not bitter.

On a more uplifting note, my new historical masterpiece, titled, WONDER OF THE WEST, won another gold medal this past week for “Outstanding U.S. History Book of 2025.” The award was presented by the NIEA, which is the National Indie Excellence Awards. (now in its 19th year!) I am greatly honored to receive the gold medal, and I truly appreciate the substantial financial remuneration. (i.e., loot) If you happen to find yourself in Washington, D.C. next week stop by the Hay Adams Hotel (near the White House) and say hello. (I’ll probably be in the lobby, signing books and drinking martinis.) Of course, I may have to testify at some hearing while I’m in town. You never know.

In closing, I hope some of you were able to watch a portion of the Netflix show “Death by Lightning.” (The story about President Garfield’s life and death.) Some of this sordid tale was based upon my enthralling history book, titled, THE SECOND MOURNING. Not to sound arrogant, but had they followed my entire book I think the show would have been much more interesting. The assassin, Charles Guiteau, was actually the more fascinating historical figure. Alas, I do not make the final decisions.

Well, my dear friends, I shall now take my leave…. Have a wonderful week and remember that Christmas is only 25 days away! (also remember my shirt and pants sizes… just in case you’re inclined to buy me a gift! Hey, you never know!) I’m only kidding about the clothes. I much prefer cash!

Take care and love to all,

Doc Yanoff