GREETINGS…  from lovely Port Aransas, “the coast with the most!”  I am (rapidly) packing most of my unearthly possessions into our pickup truck in an effort to avoid meeting HURRICANES Laura and Marco.  Nothing personal, but I’ve already seen “Gone With The Wind,” so I think it’s time to head back to Austin.  (Where we only have to deal with 7 more days of 100+ temperatures!)  Ah, summer in Texas.  Nothing like it.  (Except for northern California!)  Yikes, those poor folks out west.  Thoughts and prayers heading your way.

Due to the horrendous fires, my discussions with Netflix have been put on hold, and I’m glad they were.  Los Angeles is not the most pleasant city to visit right now, and besides, I’ve also been contacted by Fox Films, so there’s no rush.  (I don’t expect either company will start making a bunch of “Adam Gold Mysteries,” but I still have to go through the motions.  Just in case… )

My beautiful and loving Aunt Gladys was greatly dismayed by the possibility of Ben Affleck playing the part of Adam Gold (instead of yours truly) so I’d like to take a moment to reassure her that Affleck will never fill my shoes!  He’s not man enough!  (Besides, the producers are looking at Pee Wee Herman.)  NOT!  Just forget I ever mentioned Affleck’s name.  (The key to happiness is a bad memory!)

Well, even in the midst of daily protests by the U.B.D. crowd, (Unemployed Basement Dwellers) there is much good news to report on the home front.  First, I have been invited to be one of three “Distinguished Texas Authors” to speak (and sign books) at the prestigious event known as “EVENING WITH THE AUTHORS” in Lockhart, Texas, in October.  In case you’re not familiar with this event, the evening features several prominent authors and helps to generate funds for a VERY worthy cause…..  the Lockhart Public Library.

If you’ve been anxious to purchase one of my brilliant masterpieces, now would be a good time, as ALL royalties will be donated to the Library Fund.  You will be helping the children of Lockhart maintain a very vital source of knowledge and entertainment, so give it some thought.  I don’t know who the other two featured authors are, but they might be folks like James Patterson or John Grisham, so purchase your tickets early!  (I’ve never heard of Patterson or Grisham, but I’m sure they’ve sold a few books.)

Incidentally, due to the damn Corona virus, the entire event might become a nationally broadcast pod-cast, but I will keep you informed if that should occur.  Either way, you’ll be able to listen to me make up, I mean, speak about, American history, as my new history book, GONE BEFORE GLORY, will be the subject of the first hour.

By the way, since I’ve been going back and forth to the coast this summer, I’ve spent a great deal of time in a golf cart.  (No, not playing golf, but driving from our condo unit to the beach.)  Believe it or not, I actually got “pulled over” by the beach patrol for… are you ready for this…  speeding!  The speed limit is 15 miles per hour, and apparently, I was doing close to 20!  I’m such a speed freak!  What can I say?

The patrolman who pulled me over gave me a friendly warning, and then he reminded me to drink responsibly.  I was quite polite, but I did tell the young lad that to me, “drink responsibly” means “don’t spill it!”    (He reached for his taser, but I drove off!)

My Aunt Gladys has requested that I add more photos to my blogs, so if you’ll scroll down, you’ll find some photographs of my recent outing.  (Poor choice of words, right there!)  Anyways, most of the shots feature one of my grand-children, the youngest being Little Leo, and the beauty with the doll-house, my precious Goldie, with her Mom and adopted dog.  I hope everyone in Mt. Juliet, Tennessee, enjoys them!

I wish you all a most safe and sensational week, and look forward to our next chat, which will be sometime in September.  Until then, keep those masks on, and love to all…

Doc Yanoff