Hey, do you folks remember that song?  A 1972 classic, which tells the tale of an up and coming mystery/history author who gets stuck at a bachelorette party for Pippa Middleton at the Middleton Plantation in South Carolina.  (How was I supposed to know that all of those people were there for her?  I thought they were there for my award ceremony.  No wonder nobody asked for an autograph!  Snobs!)  Who names their kid Pippa?  Never heard of such a thing.  I have heard of Pippi Longstocking, whose house, coincidentally, is on Amelia Island.  (This is where they filmed that annoying movie.)  I walked by the house last week, and it still looks pretty good, which my grandchildren will be happy to hear.

For those of you who asked about Middleton, the main house (where Princess Kate and I had a little chat) is now in ruins, but the foundation and existing home dates back to the early 1700s, and is surrounded by 500 acres of land and one of America’s most beautiful formal gardens.  (The main house was destroyed by Yankee Carpet-Bagging Scum during the Civil War.  Their words, not mine.)  The garden is mind-boggling in its beauty and complexity, and was recognized nationally in 1941, when the Garden Club of America conferred its highest award on Middleton Place, naming it “the most interesting and important garden in America.”  (My rock garden in Austin was not mentioned.  What’s up with that?)

During our stay in Savannah, we had the pleasure of meeting two lovely (and talented) ladies from Hickory, North Carolina, Miss Gina and Miss Lil.  As I always say, the best part about traveling and book tours is meeting other people, and Gina and Lil were absolutely delightful!  True, we consumed a bit too much port during the evening (and were reprimanded by the resident ghost, I mean, host) but other than that, we were fairly well-behaved.  (Yes, the Kehoe House is haunted, but so are all the houses in Savannah!  Lots of “spirit” in that old city!)

Incidentally, if you want to view some hauntingly gorgeous watercolor paintings, take a look at Miss Lil’s website.  (She is a renowned artist of immense talent.)  In fact, she is so good that I asked her to create the front cover of the next “Adam Gold Mystery,” which is titled, CAPONE ISLAND.  (This one deals with Al Capone’s buried treasure in Florida.)  The book should be finished in about a year, and I can’t wait to see what Miss Lil comes up with as far as a cover.  You can view her lovely paintings by going to:   liltaylorsgallery@yahoo.com

By the way, did you know that the song I referred to in the title of this blog (Stuck In The Middle With You) was written by the songwriting team of Leiber & Stoller?  If you read THE GRACELAND GANG (my first mystery novel) then you might remember that they were the geniuses who wrote some of the best rock and roll songs in history.  (Including, for Elvis, “HOUND DOG” and “JAILHOUSE ROCK.)  They also wrote two wonderful songs for the great Ben E. King, “STAND BY ME” and “SPANISH HARLEM.”  Apparently, Leiber & Stoller enjoyed writing for kings!

And since we are on the subject of royalty, I would like to mention that my daughter’s elegant boutique, COVE, was recently featured in Tribeza Magazine.  The article begins on page 78.  Check it out and you will see a photograph of the beautiful and talented Rebecca Lee!  I am proud to announce that you can now purchase any of my brilliant books at her store on South Congress Avenue.  At the end of this fascinating blog, you will see a photo of her new sign (in case you get lost) and a photo of Miss Rebecca taking possession of my history book, TURBULENT TIMES.  (She’s the attractive one!)

Well, compadres, I must say adios for now, as I am off to a “Sazerac Cocktail Contest.”  (I am a judge, not a drinker, although….. )

Assuming I find my way home, I shall post another joyful blog next Sunday, describing in painful detail, my stay in historic Charleston.  Yes, I have more photos to share!  Yes, the blog writing will be superb!  No, I won’t be sharing any good jokes.  (I don’t know any!)  Until then, please take care and have a safe and smile-filled week!

Love to all,

Doc Yanoff

***** SEMI-INTERESTING PHOTOS ATTACHED  *****