Geia Sou and Merhaba! (“Hello” in Greek and Turkish language) I have recently returned from an amazing three-week adventure, sailing around the lovely Aegean and Mediterranean Seas. I am happy to report that both seas had plenty of water and the appropriate levels of salt. (They both had lots of scantily-clad beach babes, too!) I am a modest guy, but I went topless on several occasions. How wild and crazy can you get? My wife wore a few thongs, but they were the rubber things you put on your feet.

Our sailing odyssey began with a pre-excursion at the Four Seasons Resort in beautiful Vouliagmeni, an area south of Athens that calls itself “The Greek Riviera.” The place was just wonderful, and the food and service out of this world. (see photos attached!) My only complaint was about the plush towels and linens. They were very difficult to fold up and stuff into our suitcases. Other than that, I’d give the joint five stars.

After four days of consuming grilled octopus and several hundred pounds of feta cheese, we set sail for the charming island of Skiathos, north of Athens, where we took a water taxi to one of the lovely beaches that surround the island. Skiathos is located in the northwest Aegean and is part of the Sporades Archipelago. We met a lot of nice folks at Koukounaries Beach, but I noticed that there were a lot of foreigners in Europe. What’s that about?

By the way, we were sailing with Seabourn Cruises and were lucky enough to be on their new ship, the Seabourn Encore. The cruise began with a mandatory safety drill, but I got confused when they asked me to meet at a certain muster station. I thought they said “mustard station,” so I reported to the kitchen area. (Luckily they were preparing grilled octopus!) During the safety drill, I learned that you’re supposed to yell “Man overboard!” if you see someone fall off the ship. (They never told us what to yell if we saw a woman fall overboard, so I think you’re supposed to keep quiet and go about your business.)

As usual, making new friends was the highlight of our voyage, and on this outing we were lucky enough to hook up with a great couple from Napa, California. We frequently drank and dined with the lovely and talented Arleen Griess and her brilliant husband Warren. They quickly became our valued ship-mates and thanks to them, we had a roaring good time each and every day. (They actually laughed at a few of my dumb jokes!) We haven’t been in touch since they’ve been home, but that’s only because they have jet lag and are still digesting all of the caviar and steak they consumed. (Yeah, they also had their share of grilled octopus!)

Next week I shall cover some of our adventures in Kavala (Greece), Bodrum (Turkey), and the idyllic isles of Santorini and Mykonos. (I will try to include some semi-nude photos, but I can’t promise anything!) Incidentally, would you believe that the temperatures in Greece and Turkey were more pleasant than here in Texas? We came home to temperatures of 107, 105, and 104. How hot was it here in Austin? The dang cows began to give evaporated milk! (Should I have gone with chickens laying hard-boiled eggs?) In any case, it was hot. (I saw fire ants carrying their own canteens!) Should I have gone with scorpions having their own Kool-Aid stand?

Well, that’s enough heat jokes for now. Needless to say, it’s great to be home (regardless of the weather) and I look forward to opening several stacks of mail. (Yeah, right.) God willing, we shall chat again next week. (If I don’t melt first!) Take care and have a wonderful week. And don’t forget to hydrate. (You’ll notice I didn’t mention water!) Cheers…..

Doc Yanoff (Photos attached)